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One Headlight

  Never ignore your doctor’s order to go to the hospital for an X-Ray – Because you’ll end up walking around on a broken ankle for a week. Here’s a little message to everyone that called me a pussy during the week I hobbled around in pain – “Suck it.” You now realize that I have the […]

So. Central Rain

I’m sorry it’s been a while since the last post. My cankle ended up being broken and I haven’t felt like hopping over to the computer. That’ll happen when you spend most of the day hopped up on Darvocet. The young female pharmacist warned me not to drink alcohol with the prescription pain medication. They’re so cute at […]

Your Body Is A Wonderland

A few shout-outs: Leo – Thanks for the crutches. They’re working great even though the lowest setting is 5′ 10″. I know I’m not that tall, but my weight is ideal for 5′ 10″. I looked it up. “You mean you’re wider than you are tall?” (Inside joke) JT – Thanks for getting me the same Christmas gift […]

Tube Snake Boogie

Never run up icy stairs after you’ve been drinking – Because you’ll end up with a severely sprained ankle (cankle). So, I spent Monday morning in the doctor’s office. I already had an appointment scheduled later in the week to discuss my new medication, but moved it up after I was unable to walk over the […]

All I Want For Christmas Is A Real Good Tan

  Another day, another lesson… Never come into town, drop off a bunch of Christmas presents, and ask me to deliver them to your neighbor’s family that happen to live in St. Louis – Because I’m not frickin’ UPS.  Now I find myself in quite the dilemma. On one hand, a buddy has entrusted me with an important task. On the […]

Year Of The Cat

Let this picture serve as a warning – Never ask me to check on your cat while you’re out of town – Because if I have to use my lunch break to scrape cat shit out of a litter box, I’m going to leave a floater. My buddy’s lucky I didn’t Top Shelf his ass. In the […]

Angel Of Harlem

I’m back home in the Bat Cave after being in KC for Thanksgiving. And by Thanksgiving, I mean a 4-day bender. I went to Jo B’s 23rd annual Friday night party on, well, Friday night. It was great talking with people I hadn’t seen in 20 years. But I got tired of hearing the same questions. – What’s […]