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Bang And Blame

It looks like the dental industry has come up with another way to scare us into their evil chairs. First, it was cavities. Adding fluoride to the water supply took care of that problem. Later, they tossed gingivitis at us. I’m not sure what that is but I don’t think I ever got it. Now, they unveil acid erosion. […]

Still The Same

Benny Blocker “What the hell is that?” you ask. It’s the ingenious plan I came up with to prevent myself from peeing on the couch when I come home in a drunken stupor. I figured if I put a couple of things on it, I wouldn’t bother removing them. The plan worked like a charm. […]

Mexican Radio

There’s nothing like following the weekend with a 12-hour workday. Sweet. I watched the Preakness on Saturday with Tim F and TMShay. I call her that because she would rather spot celebrities than the only speed in a five furlong claiming race at Evangeline. My record for picking winners in Triple Crown races isn’t exactly stellar. Really? […]

Driven To Tears

I saw this magazine at 7-Eleven this morning. I didn’t buy a copy, but it gave me an idea on how to handle kids that sell subscriptions door-to-door.                          Kid Hi, my name is DeAndre, and I’m selling magazine subscriptions. If I sell 400, I get to go to summer camp in Idaho.                          Benny I’d be happy to […]

Out Last Night

  Looks like McDonalds is putting some pressure on Starbucks. Today was the first time I walked out of there without spending over five bucks. I went to St. Louis Bread Co. afterwards for breakfast. That’s Panera Bread for those of you outside the Lou. SOB Translation of the Day  Quote: “I’ll take a whole […]

Beautiful Girls

  I had a deep conversation with a buddy today about women who like to play the ol’ rusty trombone. He was wondering if they talk to their girlfriends about their fondness for licking butt. I doubt that’s the case. I mean, they may share a lesbian story from college. But no girl wants her friends to think she’s a straight […]

I’m An Adult Now

Here’s proof we’re in a recession. And it’s only going to get worse unless the government quits wasting our money. Pretty soon, we’re going to need a bailout to get laid. Oh, and the STDs? Thanks to socialized health care, it’s going to be a race to see if you get diagnosed before your dick falls off. I […]