Lil’ Bro lights a candle after I used the bathroom
My trip home for Christmas was a quick in-and-out. Just like prom night.
I went to Walmart on Christmas Eve with Lil’ Bro and the kids. I still needed to get a present for my 4-year old niece, so I ventured off by myself. I quickly realized that I had no idea what to get her, so I called her older sister.
“Can you meet me in the toy department? I’m having a hard time picking something out for your sister. I have it narrowed down to a snow board and a crescent wrench.”
“Don’t move. I’ll be right there,” she replied.
I can’t believe my older niece is growing up. She’s wearing makeup and talking to boys. It seems like only yesterday when she was getting potty-trained, and fell into the toilet after someone left the seat up. Wink.
Anyway, we settled on a Sock Monkey doll as a gift.
“You should buy some candy to put in the monkey’s arms,” she explained.
“That’s a good idea,” I told her.
The cashier didn’t notice the candy as she ran the little monkey across the scanner. So I taught my niece how to shoplift, which was nice.
We were waiting for the others near the entrance, when my niece pointed and said, “There’s my friend Abby.”
“Aren’t you going to say hi to her?”
“No.”
“Hey Abby!” I yelled.
Abby looked over and waved.
“You just embarrassed me,” my niece said.
“How did I embarrass you? I thought she was your friend.”
“Well, she’s more of an acquaintance.”
Teenagers.
We started to get impatient, so I had an employee page my nephew’s name over the intercom system.
That made us laugh.
We were still waiting when the Walmart Hotline started ringing next to us. And it kept ringing.
“I’m going to pick that up,” I said.
“Oh no.”
I lifted the handle and said, “Thank you for calling Walmart. Can I help you?”
“Hi, do you have a,”
“Nope,” I said as I interrupted the caller, “But thank you for choosing Walmart.”
And then I hung up.
Lil’ Bro eventually showed up, and we started walking to the car. On the way, my niece looked at her dad, and said, “That was the funnest trip to Walmart, ever.”
And my Christmas was complete.
Yeah, yeah.