Bringin’ On The Heartbreak

Facebook has lowered the limitation to create a unique page name from 1,000 to 100 fans. This means that once the SOB page has 100 fans, I will be able to secure a domain name like facebook.com/sob.

So I’m asking for your help. Currently, we have 50 fans following the SOB on Facebook. If every fan gets one more person to join – carry the one – we’ll reach the century mark.

If you’re a friend of mine on Facebook, but haven’t become a fan of the SOB, please understand they are different. You still need to become a fan to receive updates.

It should be noted that the SOB page on Facebook cannot be currently accessed from a mobile device. So you’ll have to join from a PC or Mac. Once that’s done, you’ll be able to view the updates on your Facebook page from your phone.

This limited access may be due to the 100 fan member limit. Drink – I said member. I haven’t figured it out, yet. But Lord knows I’ve spent enough time at work searching for a fix.

Happy Birthday to Chico.

Okay, I need to get something off my chest. That’s what she said.

For the past year I’ve shared stories about a girlfriend. I used the italics to (a) hide her identity, and (b) she would never admit we were actually dating.

(a) will not change, and (b) I always knew she was joking.

But the things I used to enjoy about her like…

– Spending summer nights together after a day at the pool

– Waking up on Sunday mornings at 4 am, and watching a movie

– Sending her a text message to look at the SOB because I posted “I love your ass” temporarily on the website

– Walking into my bedroom to find her wearing a pair of my tidy whities

– Her calling me pet names like pussy, when I couldn’t walk after I broke my ankle

These have been replaced with never-ending arguments and the exchange of negative messages.

Easy come and easy go, right? Well, here’s the rub.

2 Drinks – I said come and rub.

She was one of my best friends before we – what do you kids call it today – hooked up.

She was someone I could call at 6 am after a night of drinking, and meet for breakfast.

She was someone I could always call with something funny, or something serious.

She was someone I could meet for lunch, or spend an afternoon with.

Now that’s gone.

So let this be a lesson to you, guys. The next time you’re having a good time with a female friend, catch a glance across the bar, and ask yourself, “What the hell have I been thinking? She’s beautiful.”

Just go home, and whack-off.

Believe me, it’ll make things a lot easier. And you won’t end up deleting another number in you cell phone.

I think I’ll go give myself a little rub and tug right now.

You’re always searching, searching for a feeling. But it’s easy come and easy go.