Fruitcakes

Welcome to the winter of my discontent.  I know the days are getting longer, but the extra minute a day is about as noticeable as a fart in a hurricane.

Story Time

I ran into a chick at a party in college who was in my communications class.  After a night of drinking, we went back to her dorm room.  Her roommate was out of town, and before I knew it, she was buck naked standing on her bed looking down at me.

“I want to make sure this is not just a one-night stand, so we’re going to go out, aren’t we?” she asked.

“Of course.  How can you even ask that question?” I replied.

Wham bam, thank you ma’am, and I left. 

The class we shared met on M-W-F at 2:00.  Here’s how the next week went down, and no, I did not call her.

Monday
I walked into the class room, noticed her in the front row, and took a seat in the back.

Wednesday
I felt her cold stare as I walked by, but didn’t acknowledge the look.

Friday
As I entered class, she stood, pointed at me, and said, “There’s the asshole, ladies.  Don’t talk to him unless you just want to get laid.”

I walked straight to the admissions office, dropped the class, and told my parents that the professor was gay.

Stupidity Tax Offense: “Been there, done that.” – Cha Ching! – $10.

Pimped Out John Sweepstakes

College students in Texas are in trouble over a recent MLK Day party.  Check out the pictures.  I think it’s kind of funny. 

Where you stay at?

Van Halen with David Lee Roth and The Police are reuniting for concert tours?  Sweet.  Where’s my bong?

There’s a thin line between Saturday night and Sunday morning.

Benny